Karkat would be the worst teacher.
And by worst I mean the best.
He’d screech and screech and screech like a fucking maniac in all his lessons
Anyone who miraculously managed to fall asleep in his class would have their desk tipped over and a faceful of screaming Professor Vantas
And then he’d accidentally make someone cry one day and suddenly he’s this sweet guy all full of apologies
“CG: FUCK I DIDN’T THINK YOU’D TAKE ME SO SERIOUSLY
CG: HEY, STOP
CG: HEY, DON’T…
CG: STOP CRYING, I DIDN’T MEAN IT WHEN I SAID YOU’RE WORTHLESS HUMAN SCUM
CG: LOOK, I’M SORRY
CG: I’LL GET YOU ICE CREAM IF YOU STOP
CG: C’MON, YOU’RE OKAY
CG: HUGS, C’MON
CG: LET’S GO, WE HAVE TO HUG THIS OUT
CG: GO HOME, I’LL JUST PASS YOU FOR THE DAY, I GUESS
CG: COME IN TOMORROW BEFORE SCHOOL AND I’LL HELP YOU WITH TODAY’S LESSON
CG: OKAY BYE HAVE A GOOD DAY
CG:… THE FUCK ARE YOU ALL STARING AT
CG: GET THE FUCK BACK TO WORK BEFORE I TEAR OUT YOUR OCULAR JELLIES AND STUFF THEM SO FAR DOWN YOUR PROTEIN CHUTES YOU’LL BE SHITTING OCULAR FLUID FOR A WEEK”
and everyone would be so terrified of him that no one dared NOT learn their shit
no one fails Professor Vantas’s tests
NO ONE
Only there’d be that one kid that would smart-ass him and result in yelling shouts and detention. omfg detentions with Mr. Vantas. omfg.